Some people easily make new acquaintances with the opposite sex, while others feel shy and don’t know what to say. Men often find themselves in such situations, especially when they want to meet a girl on the street or online. Lenta.ru explains how to behave when meeting a girl to increase your chances of continuing communication after the first meeting.
Meeting a Girl Online
With the development of modern technology, people increasingly look for friends or relationships online—through social networks or special dating apps. Online dating has its pros and cons.
Advantages of Online Dating:
- Time to Think: You have time to think about your response and reread what you’ve written.
- No Appearance Concerns: No need to worry about your appearance during correspondence.
- Fear of Rejection: You don’t have to overcome the fear of rejection as in a face-to-face meeting.
- Blocking: You can block a person you don’t want to communicate with.
- Geographical Flexibility: You can meet someone from another city or even another country.
Disadvantages of Online Dating:
- Scams: You can become a victim of scams—some girls might go on dates just to have a free meal at a man’s expense.
- Hidden Intentions: Some people don’t plan long-term relationships but don’t mention this in their profiles.
- Misleading Impressions: The impression made during online communication might be misleading. The communication style or appearance of the person might differ from their profile picture.
How to Meet a Girl Online
First and foremost, you need to choose the right platform for communication, says psychologist and NLP practitioner Sergey Bylinkin.
Choosing the right platform for virtual dating is the first and most important step. There are many apps and sites aimed at different purposes—from finding serious relationships to casual meetings. Choose a platform that matches your goals.
Platforms for Online Dating:
- Mamba: An app for finding a potential partner.
- Pure: An app for finding a sexual partner. Not intended for long-term relationships.
- VK Dating: An app for finding matches based on shared interests, including music preferences.
- Tastebuds: Another app that matches potential partners based on music taste, allowing users to discuss favorite artists, share liked tracks, and create playlists.
- FriendAround: An app that helps find both serious relationships and casual friends based on geolocation and shared interests.
After choosing the right platform, it’s important to create an interesting profile. This will be your business card in the world of online dating, emphasized the psychologist.
How to Create an Interesting Dating Profile:
- Upload a Quality Photo: Choose a high-resolution picture where you look good. Avoid using old photos if your appearance has changed significantly since then. It’s better to choose a current photo to give a correct impression of yourself. Also, do not upload someone else’s pictures.
- Write an Informative Biography: Clearly state what kind of relationship you are looking for: short-term or serious. Also, describe your hobbies and interests to make it easier to find common topics for conversation.
“If you find an interesting profile, don’t hesitate to start a conversation. Write a personal message indicating why you decided to contact her and what interested you in her profile. Avoid standard phrases, and instead, ask questions based on the information in her profile,” noted Sergey Bylinkin.
Phrases for Meeting a Girl Online:
- Your smile disarms me. I want to see you smile more often—how can I do that?
- I immediately noticed your photo among hundreds of others. Shall we chat?
- Hello! I just registered and immediately noticed your profile. I hope you will be the only one among my contacts.
- Hi! I see no reason not to write to you! Would you like to chat?
- I thought for a long time about what to write, but everything seems too banal. So I will say it simply but honestly: you are very beautiful, shall we chat?
In virtual dating, it’s important to respect the other person just as in face-to-face meetings. If the girl shows no interest, respect her decision. Don’t be pushy or pressure her.
If the girl shows reciprocal interest, you can move the conversation to the next level after some time. First, try talking via video calls, and then suggest meeting in person.
“Remember that virtual dating is just the beginning. To develop a relationship, it’s important to build trust, be honest and open, and always respect the other person’s privacy and boundaries. Virtual dating can be successful if approached with interest and sincerity,” emphasized Sergey Bylinkin.
Meeting a Girl on the Street
Meeting a girl on the street can be an exciting and pleasant experience, but it requires confidence and tact, noted the psychologist. However, in recent years, people have not met on the street as often as before, when social networks and special apps were less popular.
Just like online dating, meeting on the street has its pros and cons.
Advantages of Street Dating:
- Immediate Appearance Check: People immediately see each other’s appearance—there’s no hiding behind photoshopped or someone else’s pictures.
- Real-time Impression: You can immediately understand the impression the new acquaintance makes: whether there is a desire to continue communicating or not.
- Quick and Simple: Meeting on the street is quicker and simpler than online: you don’t have to think about what to write to start a conversation. If the girl shows no interest, she will immediately say so and move on.
Disadvantages of Street Dating:
- Shyness: Not every man will dare to approach a girl. Often, young people are just shy or think the girl won’t want to continue communicating with them.
- Conversation Starter: You need to think in advance about how to start the conversation. Otherwise, you might make a bad first impression by stuttering or using stereotypical pickup lines like “does your mother need a son-in-law?”
- Mood and Timing: The girl might be in a bad mood or in a hurry. It’s unpredictable what the girl will be thinking at the moment of meeting. You might approach her at the wrong moment: maybe she’s rushing to work, had a fight with a friend, or just doesn’t want to talk to anyone. In such cases, she will refuse to continue the conversation, but it won’t be because of you, but her situation.
- Lack of Common Interests: In social networks and dating apps, you can see the girl’s interests in her profile before starting a conversation. But if you approach a girl on the street, finding common topics for conversation might be challenging.
- Relationship Status: Even if the new acquaintance doesn’t have a wedding ring, it doesn’t mean she doesn’t have a husband or boyfriend in a serious relationship. In online dating, you can find information about the girl’s personal life in her profile. On the street, you can only rely on luck.
How to Meet a Girl on the Street
Before approaching a girl, pay attention to her behavior. Choose a suitable moment when she isn’t in a hurry or too busy. If she’s talking on the phone or walking quickly, frequently checking her watch, it’s better not to start a conversation.
Don’t shout something after a girl who has already passed by or try to touch her. Be open and friendly so as not to scare the girl; otherwise, she won’t even give you a chance to start a conversation.
Make sure you look presentable. A neat and well-groomed appearance will increase the chances of continuing communication with a new acquaintance.
After approaching the girl, start the conversation. Don’t remain silent or get lost—make a compliment or ask her name. “Start with a smile and a greeting. A smile can make you more attractive and make the girl more inclined to talk. A simple ‘Hi!’ or ‘Hello!’ can be a great start,” noted Sergey Bylinkin.
Phrases for Meeting a Girl on the Street:
- What a beautiful dress you have!
- Hi, you look familiar. What’s your name?
- Hi! I really liked you at first sight; can we get acquainted?
- Good afternoon! I am (name)! I really liked you, can I know your name?
You can also offer help to the girl before starting the conversation: for example, open a door or offer to carry heavy bags.
If the girl is not against chatting, try to find a common topic for conversation. “This could be the weather, surroundings, or an event happening at the moment. Common topics help make the conversation more natural and relaxed,” emphasized the psychologist.
Show interest in the conversation: people like when their interlocutor pays attention to them, so listen and ask questions. “If the conversation is going well, suggest continuing it elsewhere. For example, you can invite her for a cup of coffee or a walk,” noted Sergey Bylinkin.
Be confident but not pushy. Confidence is attractive, but you should not be intrusive or annoying.
Remember that the girl always has the right to refuse communication. If she shows no interest or refuses, respect her decision and don’t insist.
“Meeting on the street can be unpredictable, but that’s where its charm lies,” emphasized the psychologist.
How to Tell if a Girl is Interested in You
“One of the most common questions that many men worry about is: ‘Does she like me?’ Understanding if a girl is interested in you can be challenging, but there are several signs to look out for,” noted Sergey Bylinkin
